We left dad at home, we left Orin at college, and we moved from here…

so Kailee could pursue this dream…

Allow me to introduce myself and why I will be presenting an occasional blog for you to enjoy. I have a BA in Business from NC State University. For the past 24 years, I have been a stay-at-home, home school mom. My son, Orin, is a senior at NC State University double majoring in Marketing and Human Resources and double minoring in English and Film Studies. Kailee, an honor student, is in the eleventh grade.

Before moving, I was owner of The Etiquette Academy where I offered classes to students interested in developing proper manners in all areas of social deportment. I felt common courtesy was becoming a lost art and that our children would bear the cost of life without social graces, therefore, I’ll be passing on some of this information in upcoming posts.

What is etiquette?

• Etiquette is more than knowing which fork to use at dinner. Just like all rules, etiquette rules have valid and meaningful reasons behind them. Good manners are necessary skills your children will use the rest of their lives and will greatly benefit their personal and business relationships. If you put rules of etiquette in your children’s heads, proper etiquette will guide their hearts. Basic etiquette rules expect us to treat others as we would like to be treated.

Where does the word come from?

• The word “etiquette” comes from the French word for ticket. Legend says that a great French king became upset because his beautiful gardens were being trampled by guests at his royal gatherings. To keep party goers off his grass, he placed warning signs, or tickets, along the garden paths posting the rules of court. The term, etiquette, became known as good manners in all social interactions.

Why do we have rules of etiquette?

• To make you and the people around you feel comfortable
• To keep you from embarrassing yourself and others
• To show others that you value their company, their efforts, and their feelings
• To fit in socially
• To show that you have personal integrity and high moral standards

Kailee said the other day after a long subway commute that she just wanted someone to smile back at her when she smiled at them. Everyone has manners; either good manners or bad manners and both are learned. Good etiquette is contagious. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to see a full blown plague of proper etiquette skills spread across our city and throughout the country?

Best regards,

Karen

Living in NYC is  great because there are literally a thousands ways to enrich your lil’ darling’s life (as our great sitter2Mom, Samantha, talked about in her post this past Wednesday). However, the downside to this is that busy parents don’t have the time to  actually find, research, and compare the hundreds of class providers, classes,  and scheduling options NYC has to offer for children. There are so many options,  it can sometime be a little overwhelming to find the perfect fit for your  budget, interests, and schedule. Cue Kidz Central Station, company founded by a NYC mom of two young kids, that makes searching, finding, and enrolling children  in classes and activities painless. The website is simple to use and saves you  hours of research by combining all the information about different classes and  activities onto one site. Instead of combing through hundreds of different websites looking for the perfect fit for your lil’ darling, just go to Kidz  Central Station and find all the info you need including prices, schedule, and  location in one easy-to-use website! A parent can search by location, class  type, price, age and schedule!

Lauren, founder of Kidz Central Station, and her daughter

The great thing about Kidz Central Station  is that they offer enrollment for thousands of Manhattan and BK-based classes  for all ages, including infants and toddlers, and are adding new class providers  and classes every day, so there is something for everyone! Using Kidz Central  Station also saves you money because every class you purchase on the   website earns you points which can be used to save money on future classes. This  is a fantastic resource for busy families looking to enroll their kids in a  class or activity!

Like them on Facebook and follow them on Twitter for  updates!

Girls:

1. Avery
2. Madeleine
3. Rosie
4. Olivia
5. Maggie
6. Brooke
7. Scarlett
8. Eva
9. Milly
10. Clementine
11. Hayden
12. Lily
13. Cece
14. Wilhelmina
15. Constantine
16. Evelyn
17. Helena
18. Bryn
19. Athena
20. Adelaide
21. Liliana
22. Nola
23. Elle
24. Quinn
25. Violet

Babysitter Ilana with a lil’ princess

Boys:

1. Anderson
2. Benjamin
3. Charlie
4. Gavin
5. Jeremy
6. Ryland
7. Noah
8. Elliott
9. Oliver
10. Wes
11. Fletcher
12. Blake
13. Riley
14. Royce
15. Phoenix
16. Maximilian
17. Henry
18. Peyton
19. Harlow
20. Presley
21. Liam
22. Eli
23. Cameron
24. Logan
25. Teddy

-Ivana has been babysitting since she was young and she’s a new addition to the LLD office team as well! Welcome Ivana! 

However, it is clear that quite a bit has changed since the day I was just a wee one.  Tomorrow is my daughter’s 3-month “birthday” and as her “gift” we will be putting her in the crib for the first time.  For the past 3 months she has been less than an arms length away from me in a bassinet so needless to say I think I am more nervous about the transition then she is.  I digress though, so in preparation for moving her to the crib I have heard from countless friends/doctors to take out the bumpers (the very cute bumpers that really tie the room together if you ask me!) so that she does not suffocate.

This is where my mother comes in, and similar to other things that have changed since I was a baby she is confused and surprised that I have to take them out and instead just tells me repeatedly that I had bumpers in my crib as a baby and I survived!  Another piece of advice she is pushing is to have my daughter sleep on her stomach, which I have also been told, is a big no no, but that my mother did with all 3 of her children all the time.  And when I hear these conflicting pieces of advice I hear my mothers voice in my head saying, “it’s amazing you all survived!”  Moving forward I will continue to take the advice of my pediatrician when it comes to my daughter’s safety, however, my mother will continue to be on speed dial for all other matters of motherhood.

-Samantha 

Our world has changed in many ways since I was a kid, and so have the parenting styles and approaches. In our society we have limits, we have stop signs, red lights, late fees, sorry we are closed signs etc. As parents and caregivers, it is our job to teach children about so many things and often times we have to say NO! Safety is always the most important limit we have to distinguish to young children, but we also show our kids how to have nice manners, good listening ears, inside voices, kind words, gentle hands, regular bedtime and screen limits.

Bottom line:  Children will push the limits and disregard your boundaries! It is their job to do this! It’s actually a good sign and shows they are seeking independence and understanding how they relate to their external environments.

Stay calm, consistent and creative…  There are many creative ways to say no or distract unwanted behavior. The most important piece is to be consistent. If you say “NO”- It has to mean “NO”… (no matter what), no matter how much crying, screaming or tantrums ensue… Keep your word. If not, you are only reinforcing that when you (adult, grown-up, parent, teacher, or caregiver) say no… it really means to the child: Show me enough negative reaction and wear me down (preferably in public) until I say YES…! Don’t fall for the trap! Just say No in a calm and confident voice, mean it and move on. Another great trick I learned is to really keep the adult emotion neutral. Children are very emotional and when parents or grown-ups react with an emotional response it feeds into the child’s tantrum and upset. Find your inner calm voice and be matter of fact!

 Example: Creative way to set a limit, without actually using the word NO. Parents/Caregivers- Make good eye contact and get on your child’s level.

Child: “Mom, can I have a play date with Jack, today?”

Mom: “Oh, You want to have a play date with Jack?” (when you mimic or mirror your child’s request, they feel heard- Empathy)

Child: “Yes!”

Mom: “Ok, I think a play date with Jack sounds fun. Let’s talk to his mom and see when we can arrange it.” (Shows you care and want to arrange it)

Child: “But I want to have a play date TODAY!!!! PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE.”

Mom: “Oh, Sweetie, I know you want to, but we have to plan a play date. We already have plans, but why don’t I send a message to Jack’s mom and we will see when we can do it this week. Who did you sit next to at lunch today” (Change the subject)

Child: “I sat next to Sarah.”

(Now if the child protested and starts to react negatively, the parent’s job is to stay calm and remind the child that that response is unacceptable and if he wants a play date with his friend he has to have… nice manner etc.)

For more information on saying no or setting limits, please feel free to email Ali with questions at Ali.Sheppard@luckylildarlings.com

Let LLD help make that special day even easier and allow you to focus on the wedding without worrying about the lil’ ones. Wedding close to home, in another state, abroad, or even in your own backyard? Not a problem! Lucky Lil’ Darlings can help before during and after the wedding:

• Pick up and transport lil’ ones to the wedding, watching during ceremony and reception, and bring home safely
• In-room sitter to watch lil’ ones at the wedding or set up and moniter an LLD Kid Zone at the reception
• Hire an LLD sitter in another city besides your own hometown
• Bring a TravelSitter with you for the weekend to take care of your every need regarding transportation, childcare, and more!
• Concierge services to help shop and plan for wedding (extra set of hands)
• Event Staff comprised of LLD sitters can help check guests in, set up venue, and help coordinate all volunteers or hired hands

LLD has a variety of services and is willing to help in any way we can to make you or your loved ones’ special day the best it can be. We will work with you personally to find a perfect extra set of hands for your event or children. For more information or to book an LLD sitter for your special day, contact info@luckylildarlings.com!

I’d like to mention one such great teacher that is a good friend of my daughter’s who works with underprivileged inner city children with the compassion, kindness and dedication that I would want for my children. Only yesterday she was out spending her own money, as teachers have to do, buying school supplies for her class and being totally excited about her purchases. She is surely deserving of the Teacher of the Year Award that was presented to her recently by her peers. So, parents make it a point this year to lend a helping hand to your children’s teachers, work together for the common good. After all these are the people who are molding your child for 7 hours a day. Don’t you want your child’s education to be a positive experience for all of you?

Here’s to a great school year.

-Mama Bell

Provide onesies for all attendees & encourage them to decorate.  You can buy iron-on backed material at Joann Fabrics or some place like that then ask everyone to draw some shape, cut it out and have an ironing board set up to apply.

The hostess drew the cute  whale onesie below, but you can use stencils for the less artistic.  There was a cute baseball and bat one for a summer too –they all were great really. Of course the shower has to be at someone’s home not a restaurant or this activity won’t work.

The hostesses of the shower also bought the white cotton onesies and cloth ahead of time for everyone in varying sizes. They used Carter ‘s oneises 3, 6 and 9 month sizes. The iron patches work for quite a few washings, but could be tacked down with zig-zag stitching on a sewing machine if you wanted  to secure them.

The watermelon baby stroller is cute also–you can find the recipe online.

It’s always a great photo opp to hang onesies on  a makeshift clothesline with clothespins at the shower.

Comment below if you used some of our ideas!

-Lindsay with the help of Mrs. W

What are the best burping techniques?  I have heard so many. I just want to communicate the best one to my sitter when I leave her with my infant.  What do you recommend?

-Tooty Twins

Dear Tooty Twins,

Yes that is true, everyone seems to have their own method, which makes sense because every baby is different. What works for your lil’ one may not work for another. Try out a few different positions & see which one seems to mesh with your infant the best. Sometimes I also find switching from one burping position to to the other helps the baby release gas.  Here are my top 3 burping positions that seem to work best with an infant:

• Hold your baby with their chin near your shoulder, support the baby with one hand and gently pat/rub their back with the other to sooth them while allowing their body to stretch out
• Sit your baby on your lap with one hand supporting their chin and pat/rub their back
• Lay your baby at a slight angle (with their head higher then their chest) on your lap facing you, rub their belly to sooth them while they stretch out their body. I use this method as a last resort after trying the first two above

Right after burping. The twins are as happy as can be.

Remember to support your lil’ ones head and pat/rub gently.  Your baby doesn’t always need to be burped, if he or she seems happy, they’re probably comfortable. And don’t forget to use a burp cloth regardless of the method you choose.

-LB